Everyone wants to love and be loved. Love is not always easy, but the opposite is loneliness, which is downright miserable at times. Anyone can increase the amount of love in their lives, even if they don't find a special person to marry. Love comes in other forms that can be almost as satisfying as a good marriage. And keep in mind that even loneliness beats being locked into a miserable marriage situation! So, how can you find love in your life?

Love is not primarily something you will get, but something you must give. If you are looking to get love first without giving it, you are likely to be disappointed. It is by giving first that you will increase the love in your heart. If you make a practice of loving others, you will probably wake one day and find that you are greatly loved in return.

If you started reading this article because you're looking for that special love of your life, don't stop reading. It's the same in romance, too. It all starts with a giving heart. The man or woman who will be treasured by their spouse some day is the one who has that other person's comfort, happiness, and well-being first and foremost in their mind at all times. Selfishness is the direct opposite of love, and being selfish cannot help but render a person virtually unlovable.

So the first step in finding love is to be selfless. This does not come naturally to any of us. Especially in matters of romantic love, we want our desires to be fulfilled. But think about the golden rule for a moment. What do we want? Do we want our loved one to simply use us to meet their needs without considering ours? Of course not. It is dehumanizing to be used for someone else's purposes with no thought to our own needs.

You can start now to become a selfless person who will be loved by many. Find an outlet for your compassionate side. Do you love animals? Take in a pet from the animal shelter. Do you like children? Teach a Sunday school class or help coach a little league team. During these activities you will have to give of yourself, and you might just run across that special new person in your life, too. One thing's for sure, and that is if you stay cooped up at home feeling sorry for yourself, you won't meet anyone!

Branch out and give of yourself. When you do find that special person you'd like to get to know better, don't rush them when dating. Treat them like royalty. But be honest. Don't try so hard to win their affections that you become a phony. If you do, you will never be able to keep up the act after you win them. The result will be disappointment for both you and your friend. Honesty, giving, and being part of life are all ways that you can find love in your life.